Ever get to the point where your not to sure where you are going?
Maybe I’m being impatient and wanting things to change for the better. Don’t get me wrong, I like where things are at and how my life is going so far. Given everything that has happen in the last two years. But sometimes I feel stuck in this loop that’s always repeating.
I think that is one of the main reasons why I started this blog in the first place. Plus with podcasting again now, that adds another escape. I use to do a lot of paintings and/or drawing, but I find myself turned off by it. I think it was mostly cause by other people’s thoughts about my art. Or it became what the other person wanted, I got use to doing pictures for other people or changing my style because what I was painting bothered them.. I wasn’t doing it for me anymore… Infact I haven’t painted anything for myself in years. Maybe I should try and change that. I miss doing art shows and getting together with other artist and talking shop.
I know I started writing a book about a year and half ago. I think it only 25% done and I hit a wall. I have the idea where the book is going to go, as well as the subject matter. I mean it’s mostly stories from my life, it’s just shockingly hard to get down on paper. I think the problem I’m running into, is that I’m worried about people might think about it. Altho I’m at the point where I really don’t care anymore haha. Been judged on my past for so long, guess I got a little punchy. My history is what is it and I don’t regret one things at all.
When it is all said and done. I am happy, I have a job, a roof over my head and a wonderful girlfriend. Plus I have two health kids that cause grey hair and drive me up the wall at times hahaha.