So I finally went out and got my first Covid shot the other day. The shot itself wasn’t that bad, later on in the day it felt like having icy hot under the skin and someone punch you in the arm really good. The following day my arm was a little sore and still felt like someone punched me in the arm.
But it didn’t slow me down really. I guess we will see what happens when I get the second shot.
With much frustration I am writing this post to share. Why? I think in some weird way I hope it shows someone that they aren’t the only ones going to stressful times in dealing with custody battles. I believe I have shared this few times now, that I have been in a custody battle for “officially” two years now. I say “officially” because I went out and found a lawyer to help me with this battle. It’s actually been a uphill battle for almost 10+ years. Sure there have been a few good times, where everything was going smoothly. But those were quick to vanish in time.
We were to have our trial on the 26th of May… Not so much… The day right before, we got the call that it was pushed back due to a criminal trial. This has happen to us twice before and not to mention all the problems Covid caused and other the other party moving out of state. We were able to have a settlement hearing in hopes of coming to some type of agreement. What is the saying? Wish in one hand and crap in the other. See which one fills up first. I mean the fact most of us didn’t have much faith in this hearing. But I had a “small” hope that maybe, maybe she might see the problems.
With out going into much detail. The settlement hearing was a waste of time and the judge called. Turns out the other party has their significant other in the same room as them(they video call into the courts). When it was only for Lawyers and the two parties involved. Because of this the judge could not take her answers as truthful. Also the fact that we were on two different sides as far as parenting plans go. Fact of the matter is, we have offered a number of plans and she as rejected all of them. Even the Oregon standard long distance parenting plan. No changes, plan as is… But she rejected it.. Had she taken that deal, she would have had the kids this summer and possibly Christmas. But that is not the case now and we have moved on to what is best for the kids and not the adult.
Fact that the families for both sides are in Oregon, their friends as in Oregon. They have a stable foundation that was built in Oregon and to up root them to a state they never been before. Where they know no one and have zero family out here, not to mention the problem with the stepparent. But that is a headache of a story for another time…..
So after the settlement hearing was ended, the lawyer and myself talked about our next course of action. We were able to get a new trial date that wasn’t to far away and more confident that it will actually go through. Everyone wants this done with… It’s hard to deal with this and also plan a wedding at the same time. The trial is always in the back of my mind and is the cause of much stress. I believe this is the cause of number white hairs now haha.
So that is the current state if things, with out going into much detail. Sadly a lot of my time is devoted to this and a number of project have taken a backseat. Like my blog here. BUT!! Hopefully soon that will change and we can move on with life. Thank you for reading my drama and I am sorry for not updating as much as I normally do.
*Looks blankly at the warm glow of the computer screen*
*Looks down that new Bang energy coffee drink I got the other day. Thinking about where to start this post.*
*Takes a drink of the Bang coffee drink………..*
Ugh! By Loki’s nasty swamp ass. This drink is terrible……. *Looks down at drink and walks to the sink.* What the hell? It basically feels like it covers your whole mouth in this fake milk flavor.. UGH.
*Grabs a Monster instead.*
So here I am at 7 in the morning waiting for my oldest to finish getting ready for school… It’s been a SLOW going so far haha. But to be fair, she has been able to sleep in most of the school year. Their school schedule was rather consistent there for a bit. Then they tried hybrid learning and that was made into two groups, AM and PM. Both kids got lucky and was put on the PM shift. So their school time looked like this:
Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday start at 12:35pm to 3:50pm. Wednesday at home starting at 8:45am to 3:00pm….
Now they just changed it again and it’s starting today. So now they want “full” school days, Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday at 8:15am to 2:30pm. Again Wednesdays at home starting at 8:45am to 3:00am. Wednesdays are serving as a free day to work on their assignments from home and check in on ZOOM. While the school is cleaning everything.. Personally I think they should have just left the whole thing alone at this point. You only have a couple of months left of this school year till summer. I would have spent this time to plan for in person school for next year. But the kids are doing rather well with the changes, as annoying as they are. But having me here with them all the time and making sure they are getting their work done. As much as I might annoy them, it’s working out for them. After talking with some of the teachers, guess a lot of parents aren’t fully involved. Complain about everything and not willing to help with this process.
I think in one of my other posts I talked about my custody trial. We are still waiting on that sadly. We did have some long conversations about the kids and their feelings towards their mother. My youngest doesn’t want to talk with her anymore and hasn’t in over a month now. My oldest is now in the same boat.. It is a sad thing really. But hopefully things will work out by the time the end of May comes. Till then, we will maintain the course we are on.
On a more chipper news! Everything is coming together for the wedding in August. We got our arch in from over seas and our drinking horns finally came! We also got our custom guest signing “book” is you will. The theme for the wedding is vary heavy in the Lord of the Rings/Middle Earth, with some Scottish Highlands mixed in. We also had our first photo shoot before the wedding and we are still waiting for those to come in. I do have some pictures of some of the items, I’ll have to share those in another post.
Other than that, things are rather relaxed for the first time in a long time. Also started playing World of Warcraft again and might dragged my wife to be and her sister into the world as well hahaha. I don’t feel bad about that.
I do have some cyberpunk topics come up. Just a lot of reading as of late, because most of the cyberpunk stories are in book/comic form. Not that I’m complaining, I love reading..
Captain’s log… There really hasn’t been anything action packed as of late. Mostly getting everything ordered for the wedding and/or put together. I think there are only a few things left to do on the list. Music being one and the other is finding someone to officiate the wedding hahaha, that one is rather important.
Other than that, the kids are starting in-person learning again and that in itself has surprising challenges. Working around the house and lord help me I’ve started playing World of Warcraft again. I’ve even pulled my wife to be along for the ride haha.
Nothing new sadly in the way of trial/custody progress. We are currently set for next month and just playing the waiting game at this moment.
We start up our garden this week. Once everything is in place, I’ll have to share the progress with that too. Hahahaha like I said, things have been rather lackluster around here. I’ll have a few Cyberpunk posts coming up and I have been talking with local comic con & other events. But those are closer to fall/winter and I think we’ll see those this year. I fear they will be pushed back out again. The rate Oregon is going with Covid…
ANY-WHO!! Hope everything is doing well and being safe out there.
So after almost a month being away, I am slowly making my way back on to things. Sadly, a lot of events did not turn out like I had hoped or just did not happen at all. The trial that was set for the 24 of February did not happen and was pushed back to May. This was due to a criminal trial that was conflicting with our case. The frustrating part was no one was ready for it, we all knew the other trial was there. But we were told that it would be okay, but that all changed the day before the trial. The day before! Ugh, so here we are with everything out and really to go. Now we must pack everything up and wait again for May.
The history of this trial has gone on for almost two years now and all of us want to see the end of this. I know my kids want to see the end and to be able to continue moving forward with their lives. I mean this custody battle has gone on for several years. Sure, there were sometimes where things worked out and the ability to co-parent was possible. But after the some of the action of the other party, I cannot let it happen anymore. So, after getting legal help, this battle has been going on officially for two years now. Let me tell you, the stress and frustration are amazing.
At times it is like we are living two different worlds. The other party has this, we are right and everyone else has done us wrong attitude. Almost fighting with a brink wall, almost. But with both families fighting to keep the kids in the state, I am grateful for all the help and support I have received. I can safely say I would not be where I am in all of this, it was not for some key individuals. For that I would like to say thank you.
Sorry if some of this seems kind of vague, I am trying my hardest not to reveal names and certain information. Not that I am worried about hurting my case any, just do not the other parties involve to case more drama.
So here we are… Trial is now set for May, kids are still in at home learning. Hopefully, this will change by the end of the month and go into some hybrid learning plan. I am still looking around for a job. I think that was the frustrating part about all this, I finally got to a point in my job where I did not have to worry about money again. Then COVID changed all that. On top of this I have Child Support still billing, even tho the kids are in my care and have been for several years now. So, there is a balance due, and they say they cannot do anything because the case is now in trial. But that does not stop them from taking my pay, tax returns, and yes even my stimulus check. I was able to stop them from trying to take my unemployment payments. But damn… It has been a long and stressful year. I think was annoys me the most about the Child Support process, is that have issued me two refund check, all while billing me every month. The terrible part is that the check that were refunded to me, do not even make a dent into the amount they owe me. We are talking thousands of dollars here.
Right now, I am here standing around waiting for things to happen. Just trying to find another job, not to sure what I want to do. Kind of at the point where I can go into different directions, yet I cannot help this feeling of being scared/nervous. I am waiting on the trial to start and actually have ground rules in place. I find myself trying to make things feel normal for everyone at home, even tho things are far from normal haha. Thank you COVID for that. But there are several good things going on. Kids are healthy and both have 3.0+ GPA, they are about see their Grandparents and some of their friends in person. At least the ones that are within’ our inner circle. We have our monthly family get together, games and movie nights. I even finished a few art projects at need to be done in the worst way. Plus, not to mention the wedding planning going on!
So hopefully I will get back to writing on there and share my little life misadventures with you all. Even maybe get back to podcasting soon and finish with a few other projects. At any rate, thank you for being here and reading my rant about life.
Given a number of recent events. I will be postponing any social projects and/or media. That also includes my website/blog http://www.nerdylifeofmine.com and the podcasts that I am currently involved with, long with any Wizard World events. I have a custody trial date coming up in a few days and this needs my FULL attention. This has been a long battle, going on for a few years now and I hope this will be the end. This has been pushed back several times and some of it was out of my control, do to COVID-19.
For those who know me personally, will know how to get a hold of me if needed. For those who do not, you can use my email at firstname.lastname@example.org. This has been a source of much stress, heartache and headaches. I need to do what is right by my family and what is right by my kids. I am grateful for all those you have helped and for the simple act of listening to me vent. I am tired of the lies and the mental/emotional games that are afflicted on my kids and they deserve better. Hopefully by next month we have some ground/official rules in place and life will return to normal.
So till things are finished, I will remain absent from here.
What is funny… I had all these ideas on what talk about and write out. But once I got to the title of these post, just looking at the 2020.. Made my mind go blank, and this overwhelming stress began to creep in. Trying rather hard to look at the positive events that did happen in this year. This has been a long year slow, dreadful year. I remember in the beginning of 2020 things were looking up, I got promoted the year before and money was no longer a issue. We had made an number of plans for the year, started to save for things. Even at one point we were looking at get a house. Kids were doing good in school and healthy.
But that changed towards the end of January and all of February. I remember when we first hear about COVID-19 was at work. At the time it was mostly in Asia and we didn’t really worry to much about it. Then we heard the news of it hitting the UK hard. I remember we had a meeting about what to do if COVID came here. While some were in denial and some tried to throw out some ideas. It all turned out to be folly. Come March we shut down the restaurant for a few weeks to see how things go. Those few weeks turn to months and I found myself out of a job. After about a month of digging into the savings, I was finally approved for unemployment. Even with that , sadly money was a issue again. School shut down and the kids and myself found ourselves stuck at home. Not being able to travel or see some love ones. We tried to make the best of what we can.
I know in the past I have made some post about the kids and a few of the events going on. But I have to say I was rather shocked on how well the kids handled it all. My oldest would video chat or text with her friends, lots of crafts haha. My youngest he would video chat and was still able to play with his friends over a number of video games. At least over the summer things lighten up just a little to where they were able to have a friend over or a sleep over. But that too was short lived. We soon found ourselves sticking to our inner circle of family and friends. People who we knew that kept things clean and followed the CDC guidelines .
Then the Oregon fires hit..
My parents and siblings lived in Talent, Oregon. That whole town was leveled by fire. I remember the phone call I got from my Mom and sister, telling me that they were being evacuated and saying that the house was gone. That all the other homes were on fire around as well. After a few hours of hearing nothing from them and realizing that everything in their is gone was a hard pill to swallow. Once I did hear back, I picked up my sister to stay with us for a few days. So our parents could figure out what they needed to do. While this was going on, the kids other set of grandparents were having health problems and were able to have people over anymore do to being high risk of COVID. So the kids were not about to see any family most of the summer. We did get to have one get together on the fourth of July with my side of the family. Even made plans for Thanksgiving with them, sadly that turned out to be a pipe dream.
Some good news came from the fires, that my parents home was saved. The firefighters were able to save the house with some damage. But that was the beginning of a longer journey for them to get back into the house. Sadly some of my old friends weren’t so lucky and lost everything. So for the next month or so I was watching all the channels and keeping up to date on where the fires were. Because we were now in the circle of burning neighboring towns and everything was covered in ash. Sky was red and dark…
Then the rains came and all but stopped the fires. On the heels of that, we were going into the new school years and school was shut down. They were now at home learning and had to set them for that. So now I am at home worrying about money, keeping the house in order, making sure the kids have what they need, part time teacher/tech support and Dad.. At some point in all this craziness, my Mom got COVID from someone at work and she had to stay away from everyone. So after a number of tests and a couple of weeks, she is now doing better. But at this point we are all quarantine and can’t do anything.
Still out of a job and getting unemployment, luckily my girlfriend still had her job going. Otherwise I think we would have been in some trouble. So Halloween was shot, we just bought a bunch of candy and watched horror movies. Thanksgiving was now a small group of family and we still had Christmas to get to.
Now comes a topic I’ve been wanting to write about for awhile now. But I had to wait to I got the okay from my lawyer. Some of my close friends and family know I have been in a rather interesting custody battle. So while all this events were happening in 2020, I was fighting for my kids. I sadly can’t get into much detail.. But it as been a cause for much stress, headaches, tears and worry. To be truthful this legal battle should have been over with months and months ago. But with someone postponing and COVID, the court date kept getting pushed back. Hopefully this will come to a end this year. I know the kids want this to be done with. I know I want this done with, the families want this done with. The fact is too, I have been dealing with for years, it wasn’t till 2018 where I finally got legal help. Needless to say I have a better understanding of the laws now and beyond grateful for the help they have given me.
So now we are at the end of the year now. We were able to get a number of gifts for the kids and family. Also for the past year I have been planning on proposing to my girlfriend. I’ve talked with my kids about it, to see how they feel about. I think there were a at least 5 different conversations about it over the year. Both of were rather excited about the idea and happy. This is something that was important to me and I wanted to make sure the kids didn’t have any problems with it. Specially with everything going on.. So after talking with my girlfriend’s parents about it, they were more than happy to give their blessing. Aside note, my girlfriend and I had talked around October. Saying that we weren’t going to get each other gifts this year and save that money for a trip or something down the road. To mostly focus on the kids and family members. I had gotten the ring before hand hahaha. So this was going to be a shock to her. On Christmas Eve after all the gifts were open, I proposed to my girlfriend(now fiancee). Luckily my oldest got it on video hahaha.
So 2020 ended on a high note, at least for myself. While I am looking forward to 2021, I am not holding my breath for things to get better. We are trying to plan a wedding and yet make back up plans in case those plans don’t work. School is still currently at home,…. So I will end this post with one of my favorite quotes by Gandalf:
“I wish it need not have happened in my time,” said Frodo. “So do I,” said Gandalf, “and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”
You can easily make a donation by going to the link above. Thank you 🙂 I have always loved this theater. Specially over the last couple of years, being able to watch the classics like Young Frankenstein or having date nights with 007(Goldfinger) . I still think one of the best experiences I have had with The Pix, was when Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker came out. Opening night we went to go see the movie, we got our drinks, candy, popcorn. Found our sets and before every movie the owner Rod Bigner comes out and gives a little story/history/trivia. As it so happened that night, we had a guest who saw the first Star Wars: A New Hope(first one released) in that theater. He had seen every Star Wars movie in that theater, that’s incredible. That is also saying something about this theater. There is a friendly, warmth about this place that is hard to put into words. You are always made to feel welcome, comfortable and being able to interact with everyone there and the movies is awesome.
Plus also they are massive fellow nerd over there!!
“Story: We are Alex Stone, Tina Springer and Lisa Schwartz, three Albany residents who simply LOVE THE PIX and can’t imagine our post-COVID-19 lives without it. We are concerned about the impact of COVID-19 on cinemas nationwide and we don’t want to see The Pix become a casualty of the pandemic. The Pix is seating at 50% capacity plus social-distancing between groups, and many shows have low attendance. To make things more difficult, Hollywood is releasing very few new movies.
The campaign’s goal is to raise $18,000. This sum will offset the rent for the Pix for 11 months (November 2020 – September 2021) and pay the fees associated with this campaign. All funds will go directly to The Pix to help keep this wonderful community cinema alive.
We are asking others who LOVE THE PIX to join us in contributing to this campaign. Why do we LOVE THE PIX? …So many reasons! GREAT MOVIES! WONDERFUL owners and staff! Great popcorn with real butter (REAL BUTTER)!!! STUNNING atmosphere – who doesn’t simply love to hang out in the foyer? COOL STUFF AND GAMES in the foyer. COOL FURNITURE! COMFORTABLE SEATS! El Jefes, quesadillas, jumbo hotdogs, frozen bananas, pie, truffles… Beer, wine, cider, soda, kombucha. ACADEMY AWARDS NIGHT with red carpet and costumes! WHAT DO YOU LOVE ABOUT THE PIX? Let us know when you donate!!